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Buying a home can be the most stressful thing you could ever do. I say this because in my experience, buying a home is the hardest thing I’ve ever done (twice).

The entire process is not generally user friendly.

Buying a home, unless you were born with a silver spoon in your mouth, really makes you look at your finances and evaluate your short-term and long-term goals and then forces you to re-evaluate those goals. Throw on top of that fact that lenders are set up to get you to borrow more money than you would ever want to (they earn a percentage of the loan amount usually) and you’ve got a powerful coctail of explosive emotions just waiting to erupt… especially if there is a significant other involved in the purchase.

Luckily we that know about the Motley Fool have a fantastic (free) resource to educate ourselves and get our expectations in order before we get too far into the process:

The first place to start is the article: How Much Can You Afford?

This article will give you a basic understanding of the lender’s perspective on lending you money, explain how they figure out what they’re willing to lend you, as well as help you answer some hard questions like the old ‘rent vs. buy’ question as well as the ‘how much can I afford‘ question.

Next, you should read The Anatomy of a Mortgage and The Two Basic Types of Mortgages as well as Additional Types of Mortgages, The Lender: Bank or Mortgage Broker? and Loans for Sale for a really great primer on lending and borrowing from top to bottom, including 90% of the options available to the vast majority of us buying a home.

Once you’ve learned about the different types of loans available, you’ll need to start looking for your lender. You should read Shopping for a Loan, Finding your loan online, and Consider a Mortgage Pre-Approval. Learn as much as you can about the lender that you’re thinking about working with… I can tell you from experience that some are good and some are horrible. If you’ve chosen to work with a broker, then be advised that your load will likely get sold to a second or third lender, depending on many factors of course, in the first 5 years of your loan.

After you’ve decided that you’re definitely taking out a loan, read through

Six Strategies for Saving Money on Your Mortgage and The Down Payment to get a handle on how to save money throughout the term of your loan.

If you’ve ever heard of FHA loans, were in the military, or live in a rural area, you should read Special Loans for Everyone. It glosses over three programs that are set up to assist buyers in getting into a home when they might not be able to under ‘normal’ circumstances.

Now that most of the ‘finances’ part of this is out of the way (I know it’s a lot of shit… that’s why its so hard to do) you should definitely read Picking Your Home Type and The Neighborhood in the Find Your Home section.

Ok, now you think you’ve found the home you want… Go read the entire Making the Deal section. Read it again. Then, read it a third time.

That should be enough of a primer for the beginner and the second or third-timer. If you run across and terms that you’re unclear about, you can always turn to the Fool Home Center Glossary.

The thing to remember when looking for a home, or buying a home is that the most important decision is “Should I rent or buy?” and the second most important question is “How much can I afford?”

If there’s a significant other involved in this discussion, then make sure that they’re involved and that you have the same goals and aspirations short-term and long-term concerning your finances.

Buying a home can be the most stressful thing you do in your life, but it doesn’t have to be.